Easter Special: Food Storage

The best day of my life was the day after Easter in the second year I was married.

My wife called me at work from Target and told me news that made my heart skip a beat. Cadbury Creme Eggs were on sale for 25 cents a piece. She had already bought 40 and was curious if I wanted more.

TANGENT--Some people believe that God created the world. Some of those people believe he rested on the seventh day after creating it. This is pretty amazing since most guys take a break every 30 minutes when trying to complete a home improvement project, but that's besides the point.

It's not so important that he rested, but HOW he rested and what he ate (since most guys would tell you that food and rest is synonymous).

Well, according to the Book of Boz (me), on the seventh day God had scrambled eggs for breakfast. These scrambled eggs were not derived from chicken eggs, but from Cadbury Creme Eggs; which everyone knows is laid by Saint Easter Bunny.

End of Tangent

Being as religious as I am I told her to max out the credit card and buy as many as possible.

That night I came home to 140 Cadbury Creme Eggs. I greedily ate 15 of them, then horded them under my bed like a pack rat.

I increased my playing time of Halo on the XBox in the scenario that the world might end and I might have to defend my food storage. I successfully defened my motherlode for the entire year, finishing egg 140 the day before the next Easter.

In the Diet of a Teenage Boy it's important to eat plenty of Cadbury Creme Eggs. They are the prime component of the Dairy Food Group and have lots of chocolate and gooey, sugary creme; which is necessary for strong bones and shiny fingernails.